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Families:  Friends or Foes?

If fighting between your family is turning your dream wedding into a nightmare, you're not alone!

A bride starts organising her wedding with nothing but a fantasy of love, romance and celebration in mind. She might have imagined her gown and flowers since she was a little girl, dressing up in her mother's clothes. She might have fashioned a clover ring for her wedding ring finger and acted out the ceremony in the primary school playground. She might have imagined
being the centre of attention for the day - swathed in white, surrounded by the people she loves and looking more beautiful than anyone in a fashion magazine.

The reality often hits home when a bride realises that her wedding day is not 100% her own. Her fantasy must include other important people in her world including her groom, her parents, the groom's family and her friends. All will have a vision of their own and, depending on the personalities involved, this can become a source of tension in the planning process.

So, how do you overcome the obstacles of family interference?

• Decide on those aspects of your day that are most important to you.  What are the elements that you absolutely will not compromise?  What is truly important to you about your day? Sit down together as a couple and discuss these questions honestly. Write down your answers to keep handy for reference in the future.
• Once your priorities for the day are understood, it is possible to negotiate the web of ideas and opinions of those involved in your wedding. There are always things you can let go.  For example, why not include Aunty Beryl's favourite hair pin as part of your bouquet rather than in your beautifully coiffed hair?
• Most of the time, the smallest things that people ask can be accommodated if you think laterally. The trick is to stand back and take a big breath and think about it fully before you leap in and think the worst.

Don't compromise on the those elements most special to you. It's your wedding, so you want to love your day and remember it with such glee that you can't wipe the smile off your face!

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